I'm hoping that Dusty Baker realizes that his name would be apt for an entertainer in what must be an ever-growing industry -- videographed adult entertainment. Because his true calling is apparently far from his current occupation of baseball soothsayer.
Today, in no small part because of Dusty's fetish for elder players (again, he's got himself a niche -- mature porn it is), the franchise for which he now festers acquired two of the least efficient and least impressive specimens in the game of baseball today. One who can't walk (hm...figuratively, there has to be some sort of paralysis fetish/handicapped porn -- but at the very least, Corey Patterson's inability means he certainly should have glasses, which probably puts him into his own niche) and who is utterly lacking of talent (hm...amateur?).
If only he had a thing for barely legal center fielders, the Reds would have a shot. Instead, like many participants in the adult entertainment industry, they're just f***ed.
(The editor offers his thanks to the Adult Entertainment Association of America for their gracious assistance in this blog post).